I am not suggesting that you run a marathon tomorrow, but we all have the capacity to commit to one challenging task per day. For example, if you are shy, you could decide to initiate a conversation with someone new every day. If you want to improve your diet, you could decide to eat one vegetarian meal a day. If you hate exercising, you could do a set of pullups, situps, or pushups each day.
If you do not read enough, decide that you will read one chapter of a book at lunchtime. Whatever it is, make the commitment to do something challenging that will stretch your limits a little. So what if it is difficult? You have what it takes. When you do this, you will slowly, but surely, build your belief in yourself.
It might even become contagious! Goal-setting is one of the most powerful actions we can take in our lives. Not only does it make a clear vision which we can move toward, it also shows us how to get there. This is done by breaking down our goals into smaller, actionable steps. You can use our free tool to help you set goals.
This is extremely liberating and empowering because it enables us to take small steps which eventually lead us to our desired destination.
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Without the small steps, our goals often appear to be too lofty. By breaking down our goals into small steps, we create a valuable road map which we can have confidence in. When you lack the self-confidence to pursue big goals, break the goals down into smaller increments that you can manage. This will give you the confidence that you can achieve your dreams if you simply do the small things each day. And celebrate each time you complete a small step! Ask anyone old and wise for life advice and one of the things they will probably recommend is to forget caring what others think.
I was given this advice a few years ago and heeding it has been liberating. Too many people spend too much energy and time trying to please others and worrying about what others think of them. If we care too much about the opinions of others, it is as if we are giving them the keys to our happiness.
You can reclaim that power by deciding that you will stop worrying about what others think about you. This does not mean that you become insensitive to their feelings and behave inconsiderately. It just means that you will focus on your thoughts, words, and deeds rather than the opinions of others.
When you decide to take this step, you will feel a giant weight lifted off your shoulders and a boost in your self-belief. One of the worst things we can do for our self-confidence is to constantly compare ourselves to others. Since every one of us is unique and different, comparisons only create heartache and false feelings of superiority or inferiority.
Instead, we can concentrate on things that provide us meaning and happiness. We can stop comparing bank accounts, Ivy League schools, the cars we drive, the jobs and status we have. Instead, we can live our lives and be confident in our ability to pursue what really matters to us. All of us have principles and values that we subscribe to. These are the core beliefs that shape us morally and ethically. When we are clear about our principles and values and we live by them, we develop self-confidence and resiliency. When our actions are in line with our core beliefs, we feel happy, empowered, and at peace.
When we fail to do that, we feel scared, doubtful, and timid. Make it a point to identify your core principles and values and live your life accordingly. It will raise your confidence like you will never believe. Movement has been shown to improve mood and confidence. Think back to a time when you danced, exercised vigorously, or did yoga.
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Chances are that you felt great while doing it. Moving and being active stimulates us and creates positive feelings. It is one of the reasons that Tony Robbins jumps on a trampoline before he begins one of his famous talks. Make the effort to move more, especially in moments of self-doubt. Success is really the accumulation of smaller successes.
By consistently and repeatedly performing certain tasks, we work our way towards our eventual goal. Along the way, we build momentum and build confidence.
How to Believe in Yourself and Build Self-Confidence
It is an extremely effective way to change our lives for the better. While our distant goals can sometimes seem too lofty and beyond our reach, when we complete small actions consistently, we know that we are like a car driving cross country, with the first mile counting as much as the last one. Meditation is an extremely useful tool that can work wonders on our self-confidence.
Meditation is to the mind what exercise is to the body.
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It trains our minds and enables us to observe our thoughts. This allows us to notice both empowering and limiting thoughts. It helps us to detect the mental chatter that constantly goes on in our heads, a lot of which is negative. When we meditate we are better able to disassociate ourselves from negative thoughts and not succumb to them.
Since we know that most of our negative thoughts are not based on reality, we can see them for what they truly are and not identify with them. We become mindful of our incessant mind chatter and able to watch it peacefully from a distance. We discover that, contrary to what our negative thoughts and beliefs convey, we are more talented, skilled, capable and deserving than we thought.
How to Gain Self-Confidence and Start Believing in Yourself
Learning to meditate changed my life and I still practice it every day. It is an investment that will help your self-confidence and make you happier. Exercise is another extremely powerful way to boost self-confidence. Not only does regular exercise promote a healthy body, it also is conducive towards a healthy mind.
When you exercise, your body produces feel-good hormones such as serotonin and dopamine. You will look better and feel better. You also will gain a sense of accomplishment and this, in turn, boosts self-confidence. Lift some weights and go for a run and pay attention to how you feel afterwards.
My whole day gets better when I exercise and I notice a significant difference when I skip my workout.
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Very often, specific things, people and situations cause us to have negative and self-doubting thoughts and feelings. These are the triggers that we need to watch out for. For example, your aunt Betsy might be someone who is always criticizing you, bringing up your failures, and, therefore, encouraging you to doubt yourself. Perhaps she is someone you should stay away from as best as possible.
Or you might notice that you tend to doubt yourself more when you drink alcohol, a sign that you should stay away or limit your consumption. Like habits, self-defeating thoughts and feelings often have triggers. Try and eliminate or limit them. Almost every time we feel sadness, anger, or regret, we are ruminating about something in the past. Conversely, almost every time we feel stress and worry, we are thinking about the future.